The Truth

In August, my roommate, Erick and I got into a scuffle. One of the things that happened was that when I first moved in, it was going to only be for six months. Those six months have turned into three years. In those three years, I have not really kept up my end of the bargain.

I am not a very tidy person. My parents never really taught me how to be a tidy person. So all of this time I really haven't been doing a good job keeping the house clean. I am also very lazy. I usually wake up at 9 and play video games or watch movies until I have to go to work at 2:45pm. He really started getting tired of this.

He said that he was tired of me taking advantage of the situation and wants me out by October 4. If I can find a job by October 4, I can stay until February.

So here's what happened since our little scuffle. I have kept a cleaning log of what I clean every day. So far I have been keeping up with it. I clean something everyday. Some things are on a cycle. I vacuum every other day. If there are dishes in the sink, I clean them. I clean the bathroom every weekend. I don't watch that many movies or play that many video games anymore. I apply for jobs everyday I have been calling every place that I apply for. So far it hasn't been good. Nobody seems to be hiring. I am not giving up.

I'm really trying to better myself. I've been keeping myself accountable. Growing up, I don't know why, but my parents never really showed me any life skills. My grandparents and other family members tried, but I never really saw them too often. Nobody showed me how to save money, how to clean, or take care of myself.

My dad watched a lot of TV. So much that he got a lot of his parenting from TV. I remember I was eight or nine years-old and I did something bad. I don't remember what it was. My dad asked me, "How would Jason Seaver (The dad on Growing Pains) handle this? My sister went missing when I was younger and he asked me, "How would My Two Dads handle this"? I know I joke around a lot, but that actually happened.

Enough about my dad, I have two options that I really don't want to pursue. I have an uncle that lives in Utah who wants me to find a job out there. I would have to find the job first before I go and move there. I would have a place to live and I wouldn't have to pay any rent. I have another uncle who lives in Virginia. He would help me find a job out there. I would have to find a place to live though.

The option that I want to pursue is that I need to find a full-time or a second job here in Downey. I have an interview for a job in Utah. I'll be making the same amount of money there as I do at Albertsons. I hope to have a car pretty soon so I can widen my areas.

October 4th is creeping up on me. I know I did this to myself. I don't know what to do. I don't want to be homeless. I didn't want to ask for help, honestly, I don't know how. I just know that I had to get this out in the open. It's been really tearing me up inside. If anybody out there can help me. Please let me know.